one two three fourrrrnication!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
