question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You made out with two different species that night
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
