happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
