oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I need moral support for this bender
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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