I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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