i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
