it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He's on the porch naked. Help.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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