I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
