Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
