What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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