put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
