i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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