I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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