There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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