I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
