the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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