She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
