Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
