I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
