He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
