It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
