Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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