HIV tests are more positive than that guy
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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