yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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