Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
