How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
