you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
