Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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