Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
