Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
we're chasing vodka with high fives
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
