she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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