Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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