i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
