is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
