I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
