I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
