idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize