Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Randomize
