How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
