apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
