On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Randomize
