everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
