we're blogging at a bar
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
