And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
