The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
my sisters under your porch take her home
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
