There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
