Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
