you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
