You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
