You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Your cock deserves a montage
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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