my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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