in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Randomize
